Perfectly unsalted

There has been a mutation in the world of crisp description, further to my earlier post on the over-adjectivisation of premium crisps.

‘Perfectly Unsalted’ now seeks to make a virtue of not adding something to something else. They have not salted these crisps so perfectly that you might not notice that they are simultaneously perfectly unencumbered with prawn cocktail flavour and offer not a whiff of that beef flavour that doesn’t actually taste of beef.

Not salting something is definitely not a ‘thing’ and so Seabrook’s – formerly notable only for their excessive use of unnecessary “quote” “marks” on their packaging – win a new accolade for being the first to name a crisp flavour after something that the crisps don’t, taste like and don’t contain.